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By bethany (dreadlock girl), January 22, 2010 11:05

Jackson (5 years) told me that he wanted to write out the Commandments. We couldn't quite fit ten on his stones.

We have been going through seasons of change, of difficulty, of quiet and silence as far as direction goes. Recently we have heard God’s leading. A while back we felt God called us to be missionaries to Spain and with all our hearts were thrilled to go. When we visited Spain we just didn’t have a peace about it at all, it was an unmistakable ‘NO’. This was confusing, nothing short of devastating but I clung to the verse that ‘To obey is better than sacrifice’ (1 Sam. 15:22) or in my case it would be to obey is better than blessing- because I just couldn’t wait to go. As much as I know the truth in that, and in serving where He has called us it was hard. So then by assumption we just decided to stay at the church to which we moved, so that we could go and work with my parents in Spain, because maybe God was calling us there instead. I do not doubt for one second that God’s plan and will was even there in that. I actually know that to be true now.

At that time we decided to pray, we have been praying since we got back from Spain in September praying for peace and confirmation about what His will for us was. The uncertain thing about prayer isn’t that God hears or  answers- but that he does so in ways we don’t expect. I prayed that God would give me the ability to not be in the way as He lead. I mentioned before that we have felt in a holding pattern- in a silent place of waiting on God. That season just ended, we are in a new season. God has recently told us to head back to Calvary Chapel and as much as we are excited to go back home- I hate looking fickle. I am the type that once I make a decision I want to stick to it even if it isn’t the right one. But that would be disobedient- and sin. So with mixed feelings of joy and shame we decide to go.

But God wants to deal with even that feeling of shame in me, to take that guilt away and give me what He intended to give me all along. After it was confirmed that we would go back, I started trying to pray and thank God,” Oh God it is so good that you brought us to this other church to reach out, to stir things up and if only to meet one person who needed us- we are so thankful” I was once again humbled as God spoke to me about how that was part of what happened because of our obedience, but not why he brought us there. This is what He spoke to me:

When you realize your place through humility, through being broken and brought down low- only then will I be glorified. Because only then will you understand completely that any step above eternal condemnation is a gift and not yours to hold to tightly, or yours to boast of, find pride in, come to expect, or feel you have earned.

That is why there is beauty in the broken and why pain brings joy. Because only then do you not lean on yourself- you have no choice but to lean on Me. No longer will it matter if others think you are obeying or hearing, no longer will it matter because you are steadfast in Me. You have surrendered.

God spoke that to me a couple nights ago. I wrote it down and the first feelings were shock, relief, joy and then embarrassment. God was working on me trusting Him, which I already thought I did. But now I realize that for me it is harder to trust Him when He wants me to do things that make me look bad, make me look indecisive or confused, or when He tells me to stay and not to go. I can be so critical, so quick to judge others- why would I assume God would share His plan for them with me? He didn’t even share His plan for me with me!!

At womens Bible study (that I have still been attending at Calvary Chapel Corvallis) our leader Cindy has been challenged that it shouldn’t be ‘more of God and less of me’, but ‘all of God and none of me’. I agree, because no matter how many bad things I didn’t do, no matter how much I could have sinned growing up and didn’t- nobody owes me anything. Actually I am the one who owes, I owe a debt that I can’t pay. I am entitled to nothing- but through God’s grace I am justified.

This righteousness from God comes through faith in Jesus Christ to all who believe. there is no difference, for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus. Romans 3: 22-24

What has God been working in your lately? I’d love to hear!

Comments (1)

By bethany dreadlock girl, January 23, 2009 13:07

Today was my first day getting into the groove of my new Operation Actually Read Bible thingy that I am doing and I am so jazzed to tell you something seriously revolutionary that I learned. I guess it is common knowledge to some, but I had no idea!!

I started reading Genesis, (Genesis 1:29), “See, I give you every seed-bearing plant that is upon the earth, and every tree that has seed-bearing fruit, they shall be yours for food. And to all the animals on land, to all the birds of the sky, and to everything that creeps on earth, in which there is the breath of life, [I give] all the green plants for food.” I read that and I walked over to Brad and asked him, “does that mean all creatures were vegetarians before the fall?” he shrugged unimpressed and I went on with my reading. I was wrong! All creatures, (yes this means humans AND animals) were veggies until after the flood!

You gotta check it out(in Genesis 9:1- 3) Then God blessed Noah and his sons, saying to them, “Be fruitful and increase in number and fill the earth The fear and dread of you will fall upon all the beasts of the earth and all the birds of the air, upon every creature that moves along the ground, and upon all the fish of the sea; they are given into your hands. Everything that lives and moves will be food for you. Just as I gave you the green plants, I now give you everything.”

I like what is said about it here (from The Straight Dope):

Remember, up till now people had only been permitted to eat vegetarian foods. Now God expands this. Humankind had been given power over the animal kingdom, but now there is a concession that people can eat meat.

Some commentators read much between the lines. The Etz Hayim Torah commentary says, “Originally, God expected people to be vegetarians and not kill living creatures for their food. But God then compromised the vegetarian ideal, permitting the eating of meat.” The dietary laws from Leviticus, which are still practiced in traditional Judaism, serve as a reminder that eating meat is a compromise. Later, of course, Paul and the early Christians (at the Council of Jerusalem, reported in the book of Acts) decided that belief in their Messiah obviated the need for any such dietary laws, and so “eating flesh with its life-blood in it” was no longer prohibited.

Crazy! that is why I can tell my little boys that the animals didn’t all eat each other when they were in the ark. I have wondered about that before. Also, that is how Noah got them in so easily, they had no fear of him- he was not a predator towards them and they were not trying to eat him either.I really found that all interesting, one of those things that I can’t wait to ask God about. So is the compromise of meat eating second best? I really find this interesting.

So that was good, but I also was interested to see that God will hold animals accountable. Really? As in if they don’t kill to eat? this is what it says, “And for your lifeblood I will surely demand and accounting. I will demand and accounting from every animal. And from each man, too, I will demand and accounting for the life of his fellow man. “(Genesis 9:5) God holds us accountable for our fellow man, I really like that. I like the way that is said there.

Did you already know this?? Maybe I am just fully out of the loop, but I am always excited to find new aspects of the word of God that I hadn’t considered before, new things to think about. I am not a huge debater, mostly because I like to make up my mind and I don’t really like to have others argue me out of it. I find this really interesting.

here are some other sites on the topic:
Bible.com: What does the Bible have to say about Vegetarianism?
Apologetics Press: Were all Men Vegetarians Before the Flood?

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By bethany dreadlock girl, December 5, 2008 21:31

I know this could become a heated debate when I say I don’t think that it should, but please listen for a second. It isn’t something I am super-insanely promoting or anything, I just got a forward from someone at our church telling us to be sure to head over to MSNBC’s Live vote on: Should ‘In God We Trust’ be removed from our currency? I went there, eager to see the results and then sat here staring at the computer screen. For the first time I felt funny about clicking that it should remain, for the first time…I feel more confused about how I feel, or more clear, I don’t know.

Should it? I will give you my scattered feelings on it, and they are just that feelings…I haven’t researched at all.

Should our currency say in God We Trust when they don’t?
There are so many people, so many faiths, so many beliefs and I personally am not concerned with offending them by keeping those words on there, I am however concerned with pretending that they ARE like us, that they DO trust in God and that we are still one big happy united family. It seems deceitful to do that, like we are holding on to a past that is gone, and yet are still pretending. Why should they be proclaiming that they trust in God when they don’t? I don’t want them to say that they do if they don’t, I would rather the boundaries be put back into place, and I feel that holding onto the notion that the US is a Christian nation is not really acceptable.

Why does it matter if our nation proclaims Christ? Does that affect how we walk? How we act or see things? NO! We are called to walk upright in the midst of any adversary, to stay the course in wet and dry seasons, and to have enough faith so that even if all around us the world falls, we stand steadfast in Christ. I say strip ‘In God We Trust’ off our dough and tattoo ‘In God I Trust’ onto our chests! Haha, maybe that is a little extreeme….but that is how we are called to walk, as if only He sees, and only He knows…and like every day is our last, right?

Okay, this all came out a little more animated than I had expected, but I spent the morning cleaning the bathrooms and sweeping and maybe the endorphins are kicking in. I’d love to hear your thoughts thoguh on why or why not you think it should go( or if you are going to get a good tattoo). What do you think?