Day 3: Grace.

Over the last three years I feel like God has taught me nothing but grace, grace, grace. There is so much to learn, and unlearn. I like what Manning says in The Ragamuffin Gospel, " The News of the Gospel of grace cries out: We are all, equally, privileged but unentitled beggars at the door of God's Mercy" (p. 26)

I have grown up in the church, hardly missing a Sunday other than for sickness. As a child we went to church most nights of the week, I was a pretty good kid while growing up, never got into too much trouble, but all this I realize now doesn't earn me anything. The real Head Honcho Sunday school teacher doesn't award gold stars for perfect attendance because He can see the heart. So much of growing up was doing what I didn't want to do when there was much 'better' stuff going on.

A while back I decided I'd test Jackson (our 6 year old) on grace. " Who do you think God loves more, a person who constantly disobeys Him or a person who is very obedient?" Without a second thought the answer was, " the one who is obedient." I agree that that does make sense in our humanness, but we are not governours and that is the wrong answer. God loves us all  the same if they grieve Him or not, if they attend all the meetings or not and He can do that because His Son made the willing sacrifice for us. Why on earth be faithful then?!

We earn nothing, but gain everything by being faithful. When first coming to the realization that it was all for nothing I held on a little to what I thoguht I should have earned from it. My gold stars!! Don't take them!! It is hard to see that, "our huffing and puffing to impress God, our scrambling for brownie points, our thrashing about trying to fix ourselves while hiding our pettiness and wallowing in guilt are nauseating to God and are a flat denial of the gospel of grace" (p. 18). There it is said, personal discipline and self-denial are not the magical combo to God's love, realizing what you really are and falling at His feet is.

The blessing that comes from obedience is the lack of regret, a pure heart and the good discipline to master urges, but not one gold star. Because I am not a kid anymore, I see that there is much more value in not regretting so much more than I do, and knowing what self control feels like. I earned nothing but blessing worth much more than golden stars, and I regret not one single day of my church-going youth.

Of God's nature I constantly try to understand, I won't ever master it, " He is not moody or capricious; He knows no seasons of change. He has a single relentless stance toward us: He loves us. He is the only God man has ever heard of who loves sinners. False gods-the gods of human manufacturing-despise sinners, but the Father of Jesus loves all, no matter what they do" (p.20) It seems the church goers are constantly trying to reconcile the fact that they aren't earning things. I think it is a life-long lesson.

I love this on the nature of our God from Fyodor Dostoyevsky's Crime and Punishment:

At the last Judgment Christ will say to us, "Come, you also! Come, drunkards! Come, weaklings! Come, children of shame!" And he will say to us: "Vile beings, you who are in the image of the beast and bear his mark, but come all the same, you as well." And the wise and prudent will say, "Lord, why do you welcome them?" And he will say: " If I welcome them, you wise men, if I welcome them, you prudent men, it is because not one of them as ever been judged worthy." And he will stretch out his arms, and we will fall at his feet, and we will cry out sobbing, and then we will understand all, we will understand the Gospel of grace! Lord, your Kingdom come!

Fasting and Prayer: Ask God to reveal the truth of His grace to you in a new way today. If you are into writing things down, write down the people in your life that you should show more grace to and ask God to give you the grace to do it.

Previous Posts on Prayer and Fasting:

Day 2: Giving Up.
Day 1: Starting Out
Allowing Blank Space.
Consider Change
On fasting.

Feel free to share your thoughts, what God is challenging you with or encouragement in the comments.

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